Judging by my addiction/passion for TV, Its official I’m a singer wanna-be (
I want to Sing Gospel), a Dancer in my secret life (
So you think you can dance), a sexually frustrated human being (why would I be checking the colour of Serena Williams’ underwear:
US Tennis Open coverage), A BBA3 housemate wanna-be (
BBA3), a pop-star in the making (
American Idols), an actor in my after-life (
7de Laan & Generations), a true Survivor (
Survivor 14: Fiji), and most importantly I HAVE NO LIFE…………………
What happened on “I want to Sing Gospel” yesterday? Plenty…..
It was a live band, live studio audience, but was it a live show? Don’t think so. Khona why wasn’t I invited? Thokozani my brother please get rid of the stylist of the show, Thabo and 90% of the contestants looked very odd last night. Eish I was looking forward to the show up until I learnt that my neighbour (
who once caught me trying to boil his cat with boiling water) has reported me to the body corporate for being too noisy especially Sundays. Ag he must get a life.
Getting back to the show, Lindelani was going to be assisted by 3 guest judges, Keke (whatever), Malie Kelly who is the vocal coach to the contestants, and Bonsai Shongwe (the same one who has been giving Kelly “The Virgin” Khumalo some hassles about contracts).
Theme : Duets, all of you should know by now everyone left in the competition can sing except Tshepiso, so I won’t say much about the contestants’ vocal abilities.
Duet 1 : Thabisa and Kgotso .JPG)
8/10 (
yep I’m forced to upgrade the scoring system). They sang a song titled “Inyang’ enkulu”, Great performance, Kgotso looked way older than a typical 22 year old. I don’t know what Thabisa was thinking about her
“we are both Africans” comments. Although they looked like a wedding cake
couple doll, they gave a great performance. Even Keke was “impressed” his comment was
“I’m blown up” – I think Keke was referring to his weight so I’m, going to help him by saying “his weight and his face are both blowing up big time. Clearly I’m not the only one with a lower grade English.
Duet 2 :Charisma and Marco
8/10, they did a Bebe and Cece number – “Don’t let me walk this road alone”.
It takes some rain to make a flower grow
It's just a simple thought I know
With your love and care
I will have no fears
Hallelujah Bazalwane – if you have not accepted Jesus Christ as your REDEEMER , please do so because this TRAIN is a one way EXPRESS TRAIN.
Where was I again? Ag there’s nothing to write about Marco and Charisma’s performance.
Duet 3: Austine and Ntokozo aka Siphumelele 9/10, What did I tell you about Ntokozo changing her name? I say this in nice way – Ntokozo’s hair style was really destructing me. Damn sisi, even my 60 year old uneducated mother, has a better weave than Bonang and Khanyi Mbau – so what’s your excuse wena? Austine’s wardrobe and image is a delight yazi – small & short pants, white shoes and S-curl are so @#$%#%%#$. Shame where you born in #$%^ bhuti? Kelly Khumalo’s former boss Bonsai said “they killed the style” – what style were you referring to bhuti? No wonder Kelly left your establishment, your vocab is so amusing.
Duet 4: Lusanda & Shannon aka Oprah and Gail 
10/10. Well deserved perfect score. Who’s the MORON who lied and said DIVA Lucy didn’t make it to the top 10? WOW, Oprah and Gail gave the best performance for the night. “Now BEHOLD the LAMB” I think by Kirk Franklin (not sure), the song has special memories for me, AWESOME PERFORMACE. They looked cute in their black and white outfits. Lusanda as promised has toned it down and is focused on his singing. Great performance mfana wase Gugs. My fav verse on the song is :
Thank You for the Lamb
the Precious Lamb of God
Because of Your grace
I can finish this race
the Precious Lamb of God
GOD is great ALL the time.
Duet 5: Tshepiso and Pertunia 
6/10, lowest score for the night. The song they chose was one of the easiest songs – I’m your Angel by R Kelly. Its no secret I hate the song but damn even I and my shower could have done a better job than these 2. I see Pertunia changed her hairstyle from bad to worse. Sisi I told you to go to Hillbrow not Park Station. Kanti can’t you read? Repeat after me – “Hillbrow is not Park Station”. I’m pleading for the last time to everyone who’s a fan of the show to please tell me why is Tshepiso still in the competition? Lindelani please bhuti show me what i’m not seeing in Tshepiso. This time I had to take off my glasses and contacts just to make sure there’s nothing wrong with my eyes, because I’m, 120% sure there’s nothing wrong with my ears. This BOY CAN’T SING. Let us pray bloggers –
“Lord open Lindelani’s eyes and ears PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE”. AMEN. Hayi I give up – Tshepiso’s Sangoma is more powerful than KB’s. Ag mncim…
Trio – Berlinda, Mzo and Lungisani 10/10. They sang “Olula Isandla”. What’s up with white shoes? Almost all the guys were wearing white shoes. If I say 1 more nice comment about Mzo, I’m going to be called a paedophile. Bhuti, if you don’t win this competition, I’m going to sell all my fake Versace shoes just to see you record an album. Did I hear someone saying Touch and DJ Sbu want to know how much I'm selling them? Lungisani is really from ZCC NO JOKES. When he sings ingathi uyaxhuzula (anyone who can translate this into English please)
Elimination .JPG)
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Marco (its about time), Pertunia (hey usisi undibhidile izolo) and Austine (I bet your shoes were they real reason you got eliminated – anyway it was a good decision because I hear your school children were missing you – He is a DAY CARE Principal.
Next: The voting lines are open and the public can vote for their fav contestants. Call
083 913 4709 or sms your fav contestant’s name to 34709. Apparently the voting lines close on Tuesday. As from next week, 1 contestant will be eliminated each week till we get to the Top 3 on the 19th of October. Its going to be a long wait. Can’t they just eliminated everyone next week and give the cheque to Mzoxolo, Lusanda, Thabisa or Berlinda?
Happy MONDAY!!!!!