Something every human being has experienced. Let’s talk about it, right. Sometimes it results in stone-splitting Heartaches or rupturing Happiness; Psychos are unleashed within us, we lose our minds and for some it’s as simple as painting a ‘happy’ front to the public but then get home to wet their pillows with tears, in total regret, anger and emptiness every night while listening to Celine Dion’s ‘
Love doesn’t ask why’.
That overwhelming perfect and passionate love that you felt is now gone and in your heart remains ashes or a suitcase full of memories which breeds a dark never-ending cloud bearing ‘What if’s’, ‘Why’ blah blah blah, ‘feeling sorry for yourself’, yaddi yaddi yadda...
Okay, enough with the heavy lines now...below are our behavioural patterns we have when we are in a certain kind of love, with good examples ofcourse...
The Psychopath You are obsessed with love and you’d go to extreme ends to keep this person in your kraal. You would lie, manipulate and murder to win them. If they dropped you, you’d go completely bananas. If it was possible you would kill women so that the guy has nowhere else to go but to your welcoming soft and warm hands...and vice versa – your hormones excrete the most extreme amount of jealousy if you see them with someone else even if they’re providing directions to the other person. It’s called being dangerously in love – If you can’t have him/her then no-one can. Think Naomi from Rhythm City and Jefferson’ son on Isidingo. Also Muvhango’s Meiki is perfect example of a psychopath. This type of love usually ends in a bloodbath.
Naomi, the epitome of a Psyhco!The Soulmate
This is endless love, it has stood the test of time (sometimes not) but it’s undying. If you got this for someone it drives you totally off the rails if you can’t be with that person. It kills you HARD inside if you see this person with someone else. This is one person who would dump you today, breaking your heart to a thousand small little pieces, shred your it ruthlessly, but noooo, if they rocked up in front of you 6 months later and asked you to marry them you’d do it in a heartbeat!
The Lovebirds...Tau Mogale and Karabo MorokaThink the portrayal of Tau and Karabo on Generations, Ridge and Brooke in The Bold and the Beautiful, Muvhango’s Thandaza and Pheko, Lee Haines and Rajesh Kumar in Isidingo. This love sometimes ends in a perfect fairy tale, However, as soon as the honeymoon wears off, you start to see each other’s flaws and not the person you’ve always wanted to see. But for this batch of lovebirds, love conquers all.
Ups and Downs Love...Ridge Forrester and Brooke LoganThe Toxic love For most women this would be more like the man your mom always warned you about .Think Khethiwe and Dumisani. You get bleksemed and moered all the time, sometimes you stab each other with knives and get burnt with ciggies but you still go back! Toxic toxic toxic! You show up at your friend’s house with a blue-eye and purple patches on your neck and suddenly build a huge lie about hitting one of your drawers during your midnight walks to the kitchen when questions arise, as if you don’t know where dangerous equipment in your house sit. You still go back and you get kicked and smashed, singing the boring old ‘but he loves me’ ballad, this also happens to guys nowadays! This is part of the reason love has such a BAD name today. For women it’s always a case of ‘he loves me, he loves me not’ if he sends flowers a day after the brutal beating...
Match made in....? It's Khethiwe and DumisaniThe one-sided love In this one you are the one ALWAYS making phone calls, you are insanely in love all by yourself. Every time you close your eyes you see this person BUT wait, they never think of you, in fact they might only be thinking of whenever their phone rings and your name comes up. You beat yourself to a pulp if they don’t answer or return your sexy midnight/early morning texts. You can’t stand to be alone and you’d rather do 90% of the job in the relationship –you always bombard your thoughts with the few things that the person has done right to keep your flames up and can’t stand it when your friends tells the truth about the lover, you end up bitter and this ultimately drives you to pull a ‘Naomi’ from Rhythm City. You lose it! Totally Nuts! Think about poor Akhona’s love for Nicolas in Generations.
In love alone?...Akhona Griffiths in GenerationsFirst love Syndrome
Mostly females in this category, you hold on to this one with all you got, fingertips, teeth, anything, you just cannot let go. Signs of expiry date are in your face but you see and believe the opposite. All you want is this person and you see nobody else, and this becomes emotional cancer as the harder you try to hold on, the faster it goes away. Eventually you are left with nothing but an empty shell and hard repetitive questions of whether you can love anyone again... or not. Think of Pheko Mokoena’s love for Thandaza for in Muvhango. The pair has been in love back in the days and Pheko just simply cannot let go of Thandaza such that he now has to course her marriage to go down the drain.
Marriage Breaker in Muvhango...Pheko Mokoeana
With this kind of love, if/when it ends, you want to lock yourself inside a room and yell your broken heart out, as if that heals...All you think you need is this person, people come from every corner and throw themselves at you but you let them down ‘cause your mind, body and soul is focused on this person...Usually people become players and whores if they don’t end up with that first love...
Where is all started...The Best Friend You see this person everyday...well not all the time; all you want is to be in their arms and all they see in you is JUST a friend. The thought of this drives you up the wall and every time they tell you about their sexual escapades you get an internal heart attack. You collapse with so much anger inside and your heart bleeds rivers. I’m sure the film
'Friends with benefits' comes to mind.
Scene from Friends with benefitsYour silence kills you and you feel like hating the Best Fried because they don’t feel the same. You stalk their facebook wall and see their social activities so that you can hurt yourself when you see him/her tagged with a girl/guy that looks 80 times better than you. You eat chocolates to console yourself and start complaining to that best friend about feeling fat so that he/she can tell you how gorgeously thin you are, giving yourself false hope! This kind of love usually ends well if the best friend harbours the same feelings. Think Taye Diggs and Sanaa Lathan in the American flick ‘
Brown Sugar’.
Inseparable...Someone said “
If you don’t know love, someone will come along and teach you how to hate yourself, then you’ll confuse the two”, don’t let this happen to you – TRUTH is REAL LOVE doesn’t hurt. I’m sure ya’ll have stories to share, whether they fall within either of the above categories, but anything love related...please share, do not be afraid...
Pictures courtesy of google.