The fall of John Woo is complete. I guess PG’s good luck streak had to end some time. It was a good run. I don’t even think PG believed it every time she made it through another Tribal Council.
It’s hardly surprising that the other castaways kept treating her like piece of chewed gum considering her knack of sticking around like one. What is surprising is that after all this time PG was still affected by it. “It’s not easy feeling like you’re the least-liked,” she confided at the start of the episode. You think she’d be used to it by now.
Faster than a speeding arrow
Because fate/the universe/the producers are sadistic, PG soon learned the Reward Challenge would be a sort of popularity challenge involving shooting arrows at targets for points. The survivors had to allot each other arrows, and PG got all of one arrow. Someone must have accidentally dropped it in her jar.
Denise got a similarly pathetic total, which might as well have been a neon sign saying: “You are not getting anywhere near the final two with your current alliance.” Denise looked downcast. Could this be the moment where she finally got it? No, because whether by accident or on purpose, Courtney and Amanda handed her a whole lot of points. Enough points, in fact, to beat Todd, who proved to be both a master of 4th century archery techniques and very obviously in it entirely for himself. He shot his arrows without exception at his own name, which is something I hope his alliance took notice of.
Denise got to choose two other people to go on the reward with her. Since Courtney had been such a big part of her win, she was a no-brainer. Her second choice was a little more contentious – she picked Todd. PG bristled, visions of angry Shaolins dancing around in her head, while Amanda looked depressed.
The reward was a trip to some no-name local tourist attraction – a wall of some sort. Denise, Todd, and Courtney got to have dinner upon the wall, but bristled when the waiter indicated they had to cook the dinner themselves. Typical tourist trap – such terrible service. As they ate their self-service meal, Denise explained she had left Amanda behind because she was the least likely to get jumpy and leap over to Team PG.
PG makes a friend
Back at the camp, Denise’s predictions proved to be horribly wrong. Amanda and PG eyed each other cautiously at first, but then disaster struck. Amanda decided to break the ice and have a meaningful conversation with PG about why they didn’t get along. Suddenly, they were doing bonding girly things like fishing and fruit-picking and bitching about the people who weren’t there. Amanda even ended up telling her exactly what the dynamic in her alliance was. Oh dear, Amanda’s malnutrition must be leading to brain degeneration – no wonder she was so upset not to go on the reward and eat.
When Denise, Todd, and Courtney got back from the wall place, Amanda and PG were nowhere to be found. Soon, the two of them emerged from the forest where they had been making BFF bracelets and painting each other’s nails. Instead of wondering what evil things the girls had been up to while they were gone, Todd and Courtney started whining about how much they’d disliked the food on their reward. I know asking these two not to complain is like asking a fish not to swim, but is it really too for them to at least pretend to be grateful?
As you can imagine, Amanda did not react well. She told Denise her dissatisfaction and floated around the idea of voting off Todd. Denise interviewed that she wanted to stick with Todd because he was disliked enough that she might have a shot at beating him. Good luck in hanging around long enough to get there, because there’s a fourth place with your name on it.
Denise may have been reluctant, but the seeds of doubt had been cast nevertheless. In order for these seeds to blossom into a healthy Betrayal Tree however, Todd needed to not win immunity.
The IC was a redux of the star-throwing, balut-snarfing, ball-hopping, rope-chopping challenges. In other words, right from the start Denise and Courtney had no shot at winning whatsoever. They did manage to last longer than Todd, who only lasted one round. The final was between Amanda and the plucky PG, but this time the pluckster’s luck finally ran out. Amanda claimed immunity.
PG was back to her role as Public Enemy no. 1 and prayed that her new BFF would come through. Todd on the other hand was feeling fairly confident that the girls wouldn’t turn on him. Amanda remained mum on the subject, or at least that’s what the editing would have you believe.
At TC, Courtney took another opportunity to moan about the food served at the reward, but at least had enough self-awareness to admit that she was being a negative Nancy. PG rolled her eyes at this and somehow managed to describe herself as a positive person with a straight face. Colour me unconvinced.
Jeff than asked Miss Positivity what kind of player she thought deserved to win the game. Her answer went along these lines: someone who’s fought hard, hasn’t backstabbed, played a clean game, and whose name rhymes with squeegee. I’m so glad the woman who deliberately threw a challenge and then acted like a giggling, condescending jackass towards her teammates about is able to maintain such high moral standards.
Looks like she’ll have to channel her high-minded ideas of fairplay into a bitter, self-righteous jury speech, as she was voted off three to one. So much for her BFF coming through. As Amanda gave PG a goodbye hug, Todd almost sprained an eyeball. You’d think a master strategist like him would know enough to STOP ACTING LIKE A SMUG PRICK RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE JURY!
The finale is next week, and some very important questions will be answered. Will Amanda turn on Todd? Will they stop recycling that same question every single preview? When will everyone turn on each other? Will Denise’s mullet charm the hearts and minds of the jury? Will Todd explode from the dangerously high levels of smug cells currently streaming through his blood? Will Amanda be able to overcome her tragic case of Censoria Buttbluria to become the first disabled winner? Will Courtney complain about taxes if she wins a million dollars? All this and more coming up in the two-hour finale of…Survivor: Whiner.