SOUTH AFRICA'S TV WEBSITE
SIGN IN SEARCH MENU
SOUTH AFRICA'S TV WEBSITE


Who Should Replace Simon Cowell?

Written by Tashi from the blog American Idol 9 on 06 Jun 2010
Favourite this post



There were all sorts of reports that they were gonna announce who'd be replacing Simon Cowell during the AI 9 finale. Obviously, not.

My theories as to why it hasn't happened yet:

1) They didn't want to murder the show before being able to plug Season 10.
2) They didn't have time.
3) They don't have a clue who to choose.

Reality TV sletty Bret Michaels (who's just won Celebrity Apprentice in the US) has spent the weekend trying to shove his has-been butt into the action, muttering things like: "I don’t know if it’s true, but I could possibly be a judge on American Idol.”

brett_michaels_large

Puhlease, it's never gonna happen. His performance during the Finale tasted like a half-smoked cigarette and also, you'd never know if his feedback was legit or because he wants to bang the contestant.

It. Would. Be. Wrong.

So who else could be up for it? "What and who do we want from them?" My list of possibilities:

1) Danny Trejo

danny_trejo_large


Best known: for playing a bad ass in Quentin Tarantino films.

He's got the perfect Simon fear factor, except even more so. Ideal if you're wanting a judge who'll make it his life's work to terrify, freak (and possibly even smash) the kahuna's off the wannabe's.

Also very convenient in cases where revenge is needed in dark corners after the show - I'm thinking specifically to take care of types like Tim Urban and Casey James, bwahahahahaha.

2) Tiger Woods

tiger_woods_large

Ideal if you want a judge who'll insincerely grovel and apologize to contestants after he's gushed and fallen in lust with their competition.

3) Gwyneth Paltrow

gwyneth_patrow_large

If you want a thin-lipped, disapproving and ultra judgemental judge who refuses to go near McDonalds - she's your gal. She doesn't, you know - I once heard her badmouthing McDonalds on E! and got so irritated you have no idea.

It wasn't that she won't eat McDonalds that annoyed me, but how she said it. Like her obsession with apples instead of it makes her better than everyone else, grrrrrr.

4) Mara Louw

mara_louw_large

a.k.a. Sasko Louw. Perfect if you need a judge who's obsessed with bread. Her and Kara DioGuardi would also be bosom buddies, dedicated to perving cougar-magnet man-nipple. 

5) Anne Heche

anne_heche_

For Ellen. The pair of them obviously have loooooads of unresolved issues. You don't end up walking round a neighbourhood naked, declare you're God and steal a stranger's shower unless you've got mega craziness to work out.

If you missed the story when it happened, blast to 2000 to relive it: Anne Heche on her romance with Ellen.

Judging together would give them the opportunity to really work through it all for us.

6) Harold van Buuren

harold_van_buuren_large

Would deliver critical one-liners that could go viral if you put them together in a YouTube track, mixed with flashes of chin-moustache. Could even be the next answer to Susan Boyle and Die Antwoord.

7) Tim Roth

tim_roth_large


He's got the Brit thang going, could be valuable to have as a panel lie detector, but more importantly, would always speak the truth as Simon does.

8) Ricky Gervais

ricky_gervais_large

If you want someone to steal the show from the contestants with knock 'em dead lines - he's your man. Bigtime.



5 Comments

ThatDude
07 Jun 2010 06:31

George Michael

Green.arrow
07 Jun 2010 08:54

Bret Michaels
you'd never know if his feedback was legit or because he wants to bang the contestant. It. Would. Be. Wrong......LMLO,true tho'
But im so fond of him.....and from the apprentice, i think he has a legit,serious side to hgim,he could suprise people....eish mara,i remember on the show the one thing that would distract him was blonde girls, so ya ya , nope,...it would kida sorta not work sometimes

I think AI must just die.....and make way for X factor USA.
Im more curious about who will be simon's  co-mentors on x factor

Spaceman Spiff
07 Jun 2010 10:30

I think it will be somebody with an industry connection and a reputation for being hard-arse. There are a million reasons why it wouldn't be Bret Michaels but the main one is that he came over on Celebrity Apprentice as a super nice guy who desperately wants to be liked.

Segololo
07 Jun 2010 16:21

Ricky and George Michael get my vote...

Kakapana
07 Jun 2010 21:35

P Diddy, the man has even asked the creators of AI for the job...


Only TVSA members can reply to this thread. Click here to login or register.






LATEST ARTICLES

Imlie Teasers - April 2024

Imlie takes Ashu to the hospital when he falls ill, but kidnappers attempt to abduct him.


My Desire Teasers - April 2024

Kaashvi clears her name and reports Pradyumna's bribery attempt to the police.


New on TV today: Thursday 28 March 2024

Season 2 of Dam premieres on M-Net and Grey's Anatomy 20 drops on Disney+.


Hlomla Dandala confirmed to debut as Caesar on Smoke & Mirrors Season 2

The past collides with soon in the latest on Hlomla's whereabouts.


Smoke & Mirrors Teasers - April 2024

Season 1 finale and crossover alert! Caesar takes Thandiswa to the House of Zwide for her wedding dress.


Smoke & Mirrors 2 Teasers - April 2024

Season 2 premiere! Caesar's dark suspicions unravel as he demands the truth from Thandiswa.


Bitter Sweet Love Teasers - April 2024

Vandana and Kunal have a tiff after she hits him with a broom.


Lost in Love Teasers - April 2024

Savi rushes to help Harinee after Kiran brutally tortures her.


New on TV today: Wednesday 27 March 2024

A new season of Naked and Afraid bares all in SA and Curiosity documents Legendary Paddle Steamers.


10 takeways from SABC's 2024 Content Festival

Social experiment Wife Swap gets a premiere date, two shows share a celeb chef and interpretive dance takes on new meaning.

LATEST SITE ACTIVITY


More activity at TVSA Central



LATEST SOAPIE TEASERS



LATEST SOAPIE TEASERS





×
×

You browser doesn't have Flash, Silverlight, Gears, BrowserPlus or HTML5 support.