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What you do for him

Written by Toxic from the blog Anything Goes on 13 Sep 2010
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So much material exists out there on how men should treat their women. Article after article on magazines on how to give her the perfect orgasm. So much HOW TO material that is often confusing even to us women or downright ridiculous. 

I  read a quote a while ago about how a perfect man, amongst other things, stays up and watches you sleep. Like WTF? Basically, there are so many things men do and are supposed to do to show their love and devotion to their partners. On the other side of the coin, there are articles on how to treat a man and look after him and keep him and keep the home fires burning. How to be a perfect employee, wife, mother, girlfriend all in one. 

I think a lot of the stuff i read is crap and may work for some people but doesn't for most. The point of this article to hear the real stories. 

1.What do women do for their men? 
2.How do you define treating your man/men right?
3. What is that one thing you do for him that you know no one else can?

For men, what's that one thing your partner does for you? That one thing that will make it impossible to forget her/him?

I struggle with displays of affection generally (public or private) and i know i could be a better lover. i suck in the kitchen shem, i am not the best lover on earth (i try to not forget those pelvic floor exercises) and can't do that whole whisper sweet nothings in his ear stuff. I am really looking for something i can do that says to him, i adore you but doesn't make me feel like i am trying too hard.....

so yeah, i guess i am looking for stuff to emulate---within reason obviously.

Please share!



162 Comments

carino
14 Sep 2010 08:45

MaWiNiZa
14 Sep 2010 09:03

Mina i believe ukuthi we must not follow books or tips on how to treat our better halves, i say read your person and understand them and then treat them the right way..women are not the same as much as man are not the same...some women love to be pampered with material things some love to be pampered with attention...

nice
14 Sep 2010 09:28

Hi there, long time and your article pulled me out of silent blogging. it is light, and just what i need to brighten my day.

1.What do women do for their men? 

-Love my man, 
-treat him with respect, 
-sms him now and again to let him know how much I love him and miss him,
-never make him worry about my whereabouts, if I am not available just drop him an e-mail or sms so he has an idea 

2.How do I define treating your man/men right? 

-no matter how much we argue, never raise an issue when friends are around
-taking care of him the best way I know how, and 
-encourage him to let me know when anything does not sit right. He has learnt to communicate and I am happy for that.
-Note what makes him unhappy, and as much as possible refrain from doing it

3. What is that one thing you do for him that you know no one else can? 

-the love I give him, (no we are not sleeping together yet), but he knows how much I care for him and value our relationship. I respect him, listen and we dont always agree but when we argue I am never vindictive. He knows that he cant get that from anywhere else


I am doing everything right , and I know that when he chooses to leave it wont be because he was not treated right, but purely because it was time. Just be yourself in a relationship and be willing to listen. Dont compare your relationship with what your friends have.

Segololo
14 Sep 2010 09:43

welcome back, Tox!!! 

Missed ya!!!! Missed ya!!! Missed ya!!! 

now lemme go read the article

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:02

Hey hey Segs!!!!!!!! Thanks for the welcome back mogotsi!

Mawiniza, u are right yazi kodwa i am not looking for a one-size-fits-all solution. i am looking for ideas really, stuff i know i am not doing that i could easily do and that he would appreaciate (check Nice's response). 

Nice ontse o silent bloggela eng? lol!

I must start that sms thing shem. i only sms abt my whereabouts or abt dinner, i dont remember the last time i sent him an i love you sms.....

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:06

Nice one Makisto!!!

If you want me to do something, don't ask me to do it, make it sound like it's my idea and give me credit after I have done it even though you know it was your idea
Make me feel that I am in control of the relationship even if we are both in control
Wear those sexy lingerie for me every now and again

Noted...

On a weekend, never allow me to get up early, we need that pillow talk

What do u talk about?

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:06

@Carino *WINK*

nice
14 Sep 2010 10:09

@makisto, we are not playing the waiting game, he knows my reasons and has chosen to understand them.

Funny you should mention roses, he bought me roses and a chocolate last week  and as my much as I enjoyed the chocolate. I really did not get soooo excited about roses, I just dont like them. I appreciated what he did but I have to make him realise that I am not a big fan of flowers and roses. It just doesnt work for me.

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 10:10

I'd hate to wake up to someone starring at me...just wrong lol

I don't know what I do for him that makes me  'irreplaceable'coz I don't do laundry, I don't cook, don't even make the bed, only visit him when HE gives me imali yepetrol...
 I am very affectionate-I'm the touchy feely kinda woman-public or private doesn't really matter. My friends say ngiyalenga endodeni lol.

*sigh* now that you brought this up, I wonder what he thinks I feel for him....I have just realised that I am selfish...my poor man. 

realist
14 Sep 2010 10:11

Giving her money for get her hair done
I hated doing that before I signed on the dotted line and still do.

blackiekagiso
14 Sep 2010 10:12

@makisto hahaha GPY on a weekend,never allow me to get up early, we need that pillow talk i like that wann.

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 10:14

If my boo ever bought me flowers I swear I'd faint lol. He is soo not romantic like that.

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:15

i dont like flowers either....

kwaaaaa TL! Nami i'd be freaked out if i woke up and someone was staring at me...

realist
14 Sep 2010 10:27

Why don't you llike giving her money for her hair?
Wasteful expenditure.

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 10:33

"Wasteful expenditure."lmao-I bet you don't even noticed when it's done realist lol

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:34

Yho, my man has never given me money for my hair *sigh*

nice
14 Sep 2010 10:35

Phela I want to feel good when I'm with her.

Nothing beats being proud of the one by your side:-)

 realist, its not a waste........she looks prettier in those different hairstyles, doesnt she?

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:37

LOL maybe realist's partner likes to keep it really short..or bald?

realist
14 Sep 2010 10:40

."lmao-I bet you don't even noticed when it's done realist lol
In most cases I don’t. The only time I will notice is when invited to a wedding or some function.

realist, its not a waste........
You want to believe that but I don’t. Why must I waste money every freaking 2 or 3 months for the same thing? Why?

Mathaz
14 Sep 2010 10:42

My man is not complex he just wants sex everyday and that i should sleep naked, put on sexy lingerie...with him it's all physical....

Vesa
14 Sep 2010 10:45

Welcome back Toxic and le wena nice!

@makisto....I also thought gore realist is a woman! Tjo

I'll just read the comments and take notes....

pele
14 Sep 2010 10:45

Mhhh nice topic, i dont know wher to stsrt it's been awile having a serious relationship, but for the past months this  one girl has been making me crazy all of a sudden. i cant get her off my mind and i keep smiling every after phone call from her.

What made her her to be diffrent form the others:
She is an intellect, confident in her skin, very present in herself but never selfish or nagging. She loves politics like me, debates  with me and never ever spares my feelings for her opinions all in all we have the same interest in many general things. Damn i love that it's just so damn sexy.

I'ts different with me, i love my woman to show me they can be in control, but not in everything maybe in things that we all think men are in control of.

Nice, dont be scared i love the waiting game whatever you prefer to call it, i just love the curiosity that goes with it, the fact that you make me sweat  just makes me think about you 24/7 this new girl is doing this  to me and she keeps  teasing me every chance she gets, i love it.

I'm with Makisto on the family part dont compete with my family and dont even try get involved in our sqaubbles unless you part of them, but i really cant take sides as i love you all.

the way i treat my woman:

i respect my woman's decisions  for instance if they are not ready for sex, i always respect that and will never look for sex somewhere else.
i am a one woman man, i just cant date two women at the same time, maybe its the perks of growing up with girls only, what i wont like someone to do to my sisters i also will never do  to my woman.

it takes me time to choose a woman  i love or care of because when i love, i love hence you will even laugh at me when i tell you how many woman i have dated so far.

i can spoil my woman with suprise dinners out i cant cook. 
i also love taking holidays Maputo is my favourite place when traveling i alwasy want my bay next my side.

i dont offer money but i offer my help when you need it, it has become so hard to trust a woman when it comes to money these days, it really  takes time for me to give a girl  financial support, but when i trust you, you can dig in as much you want but never misuse my money i am a very stingy guy. i am Xhosa remember? hahah






Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:45

realist does yr wife have dreadlocks?

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 10:47

Your woman is NOT expensive at all realist...I do my hair at least every 3 WEEKS! and it usually costs R400

Nice Mathaz. Got that Tox...naked babyyyy!!!

Molilo
14 Sep 2010 10:47

Hi Tox,
1.What do women do for their men? I look  after his business when he is out of town, and do not get paid, sucks ne?
2.How do you define treating your man/men right? Allowing him to be him, I cannot change him.
3. What is that one thing you do for him that you know no one else can? Taking care of his business, leaving my place for days for him

pele
14 Sep 2010 10:48

heheh nam i always thought Realist is a girl, or do we have two realists here in TVSA...

Money for hair..c'mon now a girl can pay for her hair why should i be the one doing that?

belz
14 Sep 2010 10:51

LOL! LOL!! LOL!!
FIrstly, makisto, do yo have a girlfriend? if not, i can easily give you all those things you say you want, in return for those you said you can offer. i dotn even have hair boy, like you are just perfect for me!!
Secondly, *sigh* men nje, *sigh* just give the poor okes sex shame, i can think of anything else. sex sex and sex. and sms here and there. yeah, and sex.

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:53

Nice Mathaz. Got that Tox...naked babyyyy!!!

Kwaaaaa TL!!!! Yep noted that too...

wow Pele yazi, soooo wow'd!

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 10:54

*dead* Belz!!!!!!!!!! kwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwa!

MakaB
14 Sep 2010 10:57

Thanks for the article TOXIC, @Makisto, your girlfriend is so lucky to have u, i hope she appreciates you ne, men like you are few.@ realist, if you were not married i'd swear you were my brother coz that's how he feels too, unless you're gonna relax your hair he wont give you money to do the weaves and bondings, coz he tell u that he wont give you money for something he's gonna c in a dirtbin a month later,.LOL i understand where ur coming from

blackiekagiso
14 Sep 2010 10:59

Nna i told my boyfriend that iam not ready for sex,the problem is i don't know if it was a mistake or what kagore ditsala tsame dimpolelela gore ke dirile phoso e tona.

realist
14 Sep 2010 10:59

realist does yr wife have dreadlocks?
No and I hate them with passion.

Your woman is NOT expensive at all realist...I do my hair at least every 3 WEEKS! and it usually costs R400 
Are you paying it yoursef? I'm so glad it does not cost me an arm and the leg.

Ask any man to pay for it and see how far the relationship last. That first 3 weeks will be the last time you ever see me.

belz
14 Sep 2010 11:02

*smh* @ blackiekagiso. Like, i have no words.  Why would you not be ready for sex? im not even gonna say poor man, coz he is getting it out there. you  better call him today and say you are ready.

realist
14 Sep 2010 11:02

unless you're gonna relax your hair he wont give you money to do the weaves and bondings, coz he tell u that he wont give you money for something he's gonna c in a dirtbin a month later,.
Exactly my gripe.

nice
14 Sep 2010 11:03

blackie...forget what your friends are saying, it is about you and him. If you are feel that you arent ready then you arent, you will know when the time is right..............you have to still live after sleeping with him, so your friends can say all they like

pele, thetha sana how many have you dated?

MakaB
14 Sep 2010 11:08

@belz i'm feeling you girl, and they say the best way to a man's heart is no longer in the kitchen but underneath the stomach hahaahhahahahahahahaha, Give the poor men some love....(((((hides))))))

belz
14 Sep 2010 11:09

My boy gives me money shame, i dont ask for it. I jsut say im broke nje, and then we off to spar for igrocer, fuel, uyayifaka emotweni, hawu ngisathini nah.lol

CNAZO A.K.A NAUGHTYGAL
14 Sep 2010 11:09

my man and i we enjoy pillow talk on weekends,coz that the only time we spent quality time together,during the week i sms him and he calls me...

i dont do his laundry he knows that im very lazy,maybe i shuld start doing it now lol


If you want me to do something, don't ask me to do it, make it sound like it's my idea and give me credit after I have done it even though you know it was your idea
lol undinike icebo

Holding hands when walking together ,thats what i love doing most aspecial when im in a public place.....

@: Mathaz
My man is not complex he just wants sex everyday and that i should sleep naked
lol hai kanjalo

carino
14 Sep 2010 11:12

That was quick..

aboBelz naboNice.. (hlalakwabafileyo)lol

lemme read the replies...

Strolicious
14 Sep 2010 11:14

ha ha ha Belz...




belz
14 Sep 2010 11:17

waitse Makisto, that lucky girl must marry you, i swear there are few like you.

carino
14 Sep 2010 11:18

>>>Nna i told my boyfriend that iam not ready for sex,the problem is i don't know if it was a mistake or what kagore ditsala tsame dimpolelela gore ke dirile phoso e tona.

>>>Why would you not be ready for sex? im not even gonna say poor man, coz he is getting it out there. you better call him today and say you are ready.

LOLLEST

Dont listen to them wena blackie... you made the right decision. Abstinence babygirl. abstinence.. if you not ready you are not ready. Dont do it coz apparently its the right thing to do. If he respected you he would have stayed.. but if he left just coz you couldnt take your clothes off, imagine what hes gon do when you tell him you have an std. Tjo!

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 11:18

*smh* @ blackiekagiso. Like, i have no words. Why would you not be ready for sex? im not even gonna say poor man, coz he is getting it out there. you better call him today and say you are ready.

kwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwa!!!!!!!!!! Huuuu weeee Belz, yeka u Blackie. She must take her time with this. Lawd knows i should have waited and not given myself to some of the men that had their way with me *sigh*

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 11:18

"Are you paying it yoursef?"Nope-brotherman does...and pays for a whole lot more, but he never says nayi imali yekhanda-just gives me cash ngiqonde esalon.

pele
14 Sep 2010 11:19

it's hard Makisto but to be honest if a girl gets down with me on the first night, without me even knowing your surname it scares me, but i cant never rule it out it happens, who am to judge peoplo who do fall inlove after sex on the first  date, good for you it worked anditsho,  man maybe man i analsye too much i love getting to know a person i am interested into first,  all else follows.


Toxic
14 Sep 2010 11:21

TL, UMTHOLEPHI?

poshspice
14 Sep 2010 11:23

Ask any man to pay for it and see how far the relationship last. That first 3 weeks will be the last time you ever see me. 

- I thought that was the case until I met my current boyfriend, he offers me money to do my hair even on my pay day and I likeit!


belz
14 Sep 2010 11:25

TL!! Viva shame! guys, kana you shouldnt stress about these things thle. sex and love are so overated. y'all should get hobbies neh. baking, knitting, crotcheting, bowling, wow!! google ish shem. y'all will turn grey if you read too much into these things.

carino
14 Sep 2010 11:26

eish this, money thing...

Is it kengoku wrong when its the woman who gives the man now and then...?

carino
14 Sep 2010 11:27

Belz is so right..

MakaB
14 Sep 2010 11:27

i should stop being so damn independent yhu,

blueroze
14 Sep 2010 11:30

@ Belz......why o etsa Blackie so? Help her, she is clearly confused.

@ Toxic---Sorry I have nothing to add as I am not in a relationship right now, and I just realised that I am not ready for another one anytime soon. (ende e, ga phoso e tona!)

@ everyone, great advice, here and there. I will bookmark this blog and refer to it when the time is right. 



xoxoxoxoxo
Blu

pele
14 Sep 2010 11:32

hayi Nice and Makisto just a few no numbers mentioned, my friends tease me all the time, i think the main thing is i am such a neat freak, i really wont want to sweat with someone i can't  even look in the eye in the morning, so i'll rather have few dates once in a while.

 my work always keeps me company and i am so present to myself, i just wont settle for anything that comes my way ningandibiza isishumane if you like tltltltltllt 

 

belz
14 Sep 2010 11:33

kwakwakwakwakwakwka!!! blueroze. ugrand kodwa? *Dead* @ blueroze signature. ROFLMAO!!! Yho!! inspired


xoxoxoxo 
belz
tvsa

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 11:35

Yazi Tox he's been in my life for years, not as a bf-it's only now that I realised that he is bf material. Lawd bless his patient heart and giving hand lol...

nice
14 Sep 2010 11:36

Dont compare your relationship with what your friends have. 

You are all starting to compare and if you are not careful you will lose all that you have chasing TL's man who finances her hairdo's. If he doesnt give you money like realist and it doesnt bother you then so be it.

I pay for my hair, and I dont complain that I do, he does other things which I appreciate and make me love him more each day. Yes you have to nurture love for it to grow :-)

Love is only overerated when you havent experienced what it is like being in love, or you have experienced it but have forgotten

belz
14 Sep 2010 11:38

hayi shem makisto. Men should NOT be given money for no apparent reason! yho lafa elihle!

belz
14 Sep 2010 11:40

i should also try this hair thing, do those vaslap dreads or something, we can spend qulaity time vaslaping our hairs with my boo. *ponders*

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 11:41

"Is it kengoku wrong when its the woman who gives the man now and then...?" 

Inzima ke leyo Carino, it's difficult ukuthemba umntu ngemali kumina-but I appreciate umntu who can do that for me.

Holiday
14 Sep 2010 11:50

Guyz i dont know how to handle this situation but im developing feelings to my boyfriend father...is it normal. last night he send me good night sms.

poshspice
14 Sep 2010 11:53

Meeting my  current boyfriend made me believe for the first time that men are not the same, from now on I know I won't settle for less!

My man even ask me if I have money for lunch or petrol broke or not broke! it is the consideration that leaves a long lasting impression, it is the simple and basics stuff..

On sundays he believes he is the one who has to cook me, in his culture on sundays women and children take a break and a man cooks lunch and supper..

What is that one thing you do for him that you know no one else can? 

okay, I am a lazy biatch, but I would wake up very early on Sunday morning to buy him Newspapers to ensure by the time he wakes up they are on the bedside and offer him coffee or tea, he feels like a king! 





BigMama
14 Sep 2010 11:53

iyhoooooooo @Holiday, let me call Brooke Logan she might be able to help you.

MakaB
14 Sep 2010 11:53

Yho HOLIDAY, how did you get into that Dineo mess???????? yho, this is my best Dr Phil advice nhe, feelings are something that you can control, try and put some distance with your bf's father, and DONT ENTERTAIN THE MESSAGES HE SENDS YOU, HELL DONT EVEN READ THEM, IGNORE love, Ignorance works sometimes, when u entertain them he's gonna think that ur going along with whatever he's doing with you, and tell him that he is your boyfriend's father and should be nothing more.

Vesa
14 Sep 2010 11:54

@ belz....*dead* at your first comment!

belz
14 Sep 2010 11:55

LMAO!!! Holiday. Read Corinthians child. and kneel down and pray. hahahahahaahahahahah!! how old is your crush, the father i mean.

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 11:59

Yidla ubaba undle indodana wena Holiday!

blackiekagiso
14 Sep 2010 12:02

@nice carino and toxic thanks he doesn't force me to do anything that iam not ready for he understand,he is my fest boyfriend so i want my fest time to be special gape e le sekese batlang.

pele
14 Sep 2010 12:03

Holiday--do what will make you happy , deep down you know thsiis worng, if not do what please your heart , though i must say this father is not acting like an adult, hopefully you wont be taken advantage by man with no repsect for his son or family.

mathata
14 Sep 2010 12:07

bealz..................kwaaaa.

when a person want you to be his professional  prostitute(marriage)what do they expect bathong.

give me the money i will do the work(even if i have it ..i want it)

can we be honest.....thers any man who doesnt like F***(nyo) or anywomen who doest like money?

Man has this habit of forgetting  the rules of d Game.

blueroze
14 Sep 2010 12:07

blueroze. ugrand kodwa? *Dead* @ blueroze signature>>>>>>>inspired by the statement make love not war...........hihihihih

@belz....ke mnate my lovie

fikz
14 Sep 2010 12:09

Yidla ubaba undle indodana wena Holiday! Kwakwakwakwakwakwa!!!! yhooooooooooooo TheLady OMG let me go back to silent blogging..

carino
14 Sep 2010 12:15

GPY @ read Corinthians

poshspice
14 Sep 2010 12:15

Yes the situation is normal but you have the freedom to choose to do the right thing shem.

Is it normal?

blueroze
14 Sep 2010 12:22

Guyz i dont know how to handle this situation but im developing feelings to my boyfriend father...is it normal. last night he send me good night sms


The problem started when you exchanged phone numbers. why did you do it? You have put yourself in a dog box. This is Bell Phillips material, not even Mfundi has done it. So you can only get help oorkant.
*hides behind belz' vaslap'd dreads*

Green.arrow
14 Sep 2010 12:24

:-)
Great and interesting staff....

Vesa
14 Sep 2010 12:26

That was quick..

aboBelz naboNice.. (hlalakwabafileyo)lol

lemme read the replies...

Nabo blueroze?....we missed you guys!

mathata
14 Sep 2010 12:32

@Holiday....good news ele tota.

you better ask him..does he knows any mashonisa around.......Just toss him like a coin,if he do d good night  ..you do the morning!

blueroze
14 Sep 2010 12:34

Mandla Mbau 
(saw this name on the celebrity list(one on the righht) who are celebrating their birthdays. Did Khanyi end up marrying him? or is this a different person?---ke a botsa bagaetsho?)

@ Author, sorry for offtopic-ing  tendencies

Too emotional
14 Sep 2010 12:35

I have read your replies and I am shaking my head in disbelief.  interesting read! you gotta luv TVSA! 

Strolicious
14 Sep 2010 12:36

Holiday how old is ubab'ezala...is he monied? and the son?

Belz uyashisa namhlanje ne...#oldTvsa

Segololo
14 Sep 2010 12:42

Big up yourselves, bloggers!!!

One and Only
14 Sep 2010 12:42

Eish let me print this and file it somewhere then I will try 1 trick after the other and see if they works or not.

I don't like a woman who talks/wants a kiss early in the morning with a stinking mouth.

Breakfast in bed? No ways and she knows that food is not allowed in our bedroom. I can't imagine touching food with the hands I was busy touching the other things with.

Its a good thing we both dreadlocked I know how much they cost and would give her that and nothing more for hair.

belz
14 Sep 2010 12:42

LOL!! Blueroze. Vesa, ukhunjulwe yimi shlobo sam. Stro, uyazi mos. ;)

poshspice
14 Sep 2010 12:46

Is it normal?
It is normal to have feelings for other people outside your relationship but you can choose to do what you know is right.
Is it normal for a mother in law to be attracted to the son in law or the father in law to be attracted to the daughter in law....doesn't it become an unspoken rule that you don't even think of these people that way...no matter how attractive they can be...I've never heard stories where Makoti ran away with the father on law or mother in law ran away with son in law, does it happen?


The problem started when you exchanged phone numbers. why did you do it? You have put yourself in a dog box. This is Bell Phillips material, not even Mfundi has done it. So you can only get help oorkant

yes, how did he get your numbers?

I believe that there are mistakes that can be avoid, we don't necessarily have to learn from experience all the time or learn from mistakes, this is one of them...

mathata
14 Sep 2010 12:51

@One&only.........Dont you wash your  hands after using d bathroom?

Cande
14 Sep 2010 12:53

eish guys can we stick to the topic tu,  i am liking the replies minus the Holiday sagga

Holiday
14 Sep 2010 12:56

Satane wa nteka strue.

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 13:01

Ayi Stro!!! LOL imali phambili indoda emva kwakwakwa At least Holiday is developing feelings for the old man. 

Seriously though I don't get how you let yourself go that far!

Strolicious
14 Sep 2010 13:05

jipjhiwayi Holiday  o nyaka thapelo....u ddnt answer me Holiday?

hi Cande,hope u r okay manje.

Segololo
14 Sep 2010 13:12

Bloggers, does a man have to have a J-O-B to be with you? He banna! So the 80's song No romance without finance is the rule?

What happened to loving for being able to love with no extra perks?

myname
14 Sep 2010 13:16

I fail to understand why i don't have anyone in my life coz i do everything, maybe i should stop doing everything

Still reading....

MaWiNiZa
14 Sep 2010 13:19

Mathatha i thi yena yedwa meant ukuthi after the putting of the fingers in some holes..in the heat of the nite....obviously in the morning they still smell of you know what..and then you bring me breakfats in bed where i have to touch what i am eating ngesandla...eiiish

i also hate the kissing just after waiking up thing..its disgusting.
one other thing i hate is when i am in the bathingroom bathing i dont want umuntu avela engene and do his number 2 right there and there..yes i love you but that does not mean i have to love iphunga yekaka yakho

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 13:22

should also try this hair thing, do those vaslap dreads or something, we can spend qulaity time vaslaping our hairs with my boo. *ponders*

kwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwakwkwa!! oh my word, what are u on Belz? so finished! Dead!

Segololo
14 Sep 2010 13:24

*dead*

pele
14 Sep 2010 13:25

 Article after article on magazines on how to give her the perfect orgasm

This first line is cracking me up, do women really reach perfect orgasm, today it looks like these artciles area  waste of time , as orgasm has been taken over by materials. If you cant afford to buy your girl somethign to brag about to her friends from you, your days are numbered.

To answer your question Segs, only 1 in 5 ladies will be able to date a guy with no stable income, that's jsut the way things are and the madala's  like in Holidays issue are making it hard for normal  struggling guys to be even considered in a relationship. 

but i must say it's hard for me also to date somone with no direction, only if i can see they ahve a direction in life i even conisder them in my books, life is very expensive to just give someone a free ride. 

 Sex is not about men only we both get want we want from it. To eqaul sex with money is madness. someone said something about guys loving sex and girls loving money..we all love sex it is healthy exercise.

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 13:28

@Sego love doesn't put food on my table shem

mathata
14 Sep 2010 13:29

yes....so true mara.

This thing of break-fast in bed i dont likeit,phela d person can stir what ever she/he want.....bheka mina....sperms..menstruation...
mathe.

realist
14 Sep 2010 13:29

Bloggers, does a man have to have a J-O-B to be with you? He banna! So the 80's song No romance without finance is the rule?

What happened to loving for being able to love with no extra perks?

Whaat!!
There is no such a thing called free lunch. It cost an arm and the leg to be in a relationship. For the last time there is no such a thing called love.

Aowa Realist, my girlfriend and I have been together for three years and I have been giving her money to het her hair done all these years. IfI don't, who will.
3 years is not long enough and that is why you don't see it as a wateful expenditure.

ms.tebby
14 Sep 2010 13:33


I don't like a woman who talks/wants a kiss early in the morning with a stinking mouth.

Breakfast in bed? No ways and she knows that food is not allowed in our bedroom. I can't imagine touching food with the hands I was busy touching the other things with. >>>>>>tl tl tl tl tlt ltl.....*dead*


KeleFabulous
14 Sep 2010 13:39

hi Tox and evelybody!!!

i'm a bit of a contradiction - shy in public but once a person gets to know me then i really come out...kinda like beyonce and sasha lol
so i'm attracted mostly to banna ba phaphang, who can keep a conversation and the laughter flowing u know. and most people like that have alot going in their lives  - they know too many people and they're also the outdoorsy types who are forever on some adventure so they're forever running around. at first i felt neglected and abandoned when a man would go on and do life while i sat at home feeling sorry for myself. now lately i'm learning to instead involve myself in my man's life - like i so don't do clubs (anymore) and he likes stuff like that so i go with him sometimes. and when him and his friends go on some adventure i'll just tag along and even though i may not enjoy what we're doing as much, i feel great to just be with him and for him to do what he loves while at the same time being with me...hey long story sowry Tox

poshspice
14 Sep 2010 13:44

Men feel inadequate if  they are financially supported by women. It's good for a man's self esteem to work and be able to support his family, even if a woman earns more, he should be able to buy bread and buy kids sweets..

If he has not found a job, I need to know that he is studying or doing casual jobs until he gets the right job or working on some business plan 

I've heard so many stories of women accepting jobless men, support them but the moment he gets a job, iyandiza inyoni, he leaves her for an unemployed woman! because very few men can handle to be supported by a woman, it takes a very matured and strong man deal with it positively.

KeleFabulous
14 Sep 2010 13:48

and also sometimes it's best to let go of things if no one gets hurt. example, my man ke matseba tsothle. as irritating as that can be and as strong the urge might be go ngangisana le yena, i just let it go...sooner or later he'll learn (from another source) that he really doesn't know it all. and what have i lost by just letting him be as stubborn headed as he is - nothing!

i'm not one for flowers mara i'd go crazy if a guy bought them for me - the thought that he actually thot of me and did htat...can someone pls buy me a bunch of yellow roses...???

Pooky
14 Sep 2010 13:48

i should also try this hair thing, do those vaslap dreads or something, we can spend qulaity time vaslaping our hairs with my boo. *ponders*

*Dead!!!!... and Laughing Her Ass Off in Heaven* kwaaaa

 now let me go back up and read all of your replies

By the way..welkom trug  Toxi

mathata
14 Sep 2010 13:49

how can you give a person a perfect orgasm........while  repo men  repposed  her car?

Give a bitch more tha R 10 000 ......you will hear her scream.... like a christmas yellow bird...........that will be a perfect orgasm.

Not that b*s* we read.

Green.arrow
14 Sep 2010 13:56

oh but makisto..it is the  Realist i know....and whether one agrees with him or not, i think its admirable that he has stuck to his opinion ever since i read him voice it out ages ago. The only hope is that Mrs Realist understand his views and they are able to make it work for themselves.

And the classic comment from all above for me is what nice said ...Dont compare your relationship with what your friends have.....or anybody else for that matter..even the Smiths:-)

pele
14 Sep 2010 13:58

but mathata that is not perfect orgasm, that is faking it.
R10 000 you will get it from the ZEE/BEE beneficiaries dear, those with small dicks  or big dicks woman run away from and low self esteem or bruised egos guys those who need screams to boost themselves up, you can scream until you crack the roof dear, money is not taken from trees, yhini le.

Strolicious
14 Sep 2010 14:00

kwa kwa kwa **dead* mathatha ....jiphiwayi ka yellowbird

myname
14 Sep 2010 14:02

avela engene and do his number 2 right there and there..yes i love you but that does not mean i have to love iphunga yekaka yakho

SIS MAWINIZA! No he doesnt have manners kaloku lolo if wenza njalo. I feel embarrassed doing no 2 if andikujwayelanga. That sound that goes qompi qompi qompi and that smell HELL NO!

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 14:04

"Give a bitch more tha R 10 000 ......you will hear her scream.... like a christmas yellow bird...........that will be a perfect orgasm."ROTFLMAO

Posh the newspaper and coffee in bed is a nice gesture... *high 5*

Holiday
14 Sep 2010 14:07

Aowa mara this thing of breakfast in bed ke machila fela, motho a lala a ingwaya and a ikrapa di balls the whole night and in the morning give you breakfast ka matsogo a maswe.  

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 14:07

Thanks Pooky!

kwakwakwakwa mathata......tltltltltltltltltl at orgasm and repossed car! hahahahhahahahahahaahaaha!

as irritating as that can be and as strong the urge might be go ngangisana le yena, i just let it go...

@KeleF, yho i need to do this too!

I've heard so many stories of women accepting jobless men, support them but the moment he gets a job, iyandiza inyoni,

kwahahahaha posh!

This thing of break-fast in bed i dont likeit,phela d person can stir what ever she/he want.....bheka mina....sperms..menstruation...
mathe. 

*DEAD* *DEADER* DEADEST*!!!!!!!!!!

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 14:09

Aowa mara this thing of breakfast in bed ke machila fela, motho a lala a ingwaya and a ikrapa di balls the whole night and in the morning give you breakfast ka matsogo a maswe

LMAO Holiday! Akere o tlhapa matsoho pele a etsa dijo?

Segololo
14 Sep 2010 14:09

ma-T.... yellobird? xmas? *dead*

Pooky
14 Sep 2010 14:11

i had to dump this guy about  +4 months ago wen he plainly told me that he doesnt spend on a woman, i told him that i dont expect him to give me the "world"but that a pampering here and there would be appreciated as i would gladly also do it, like a 50/50 thing mos.Khange avume, even told me that he doesnt do the whole romantic thing either....uthi yena he's got enough on his plate
*Baby mama stresses(she doesnt even take care of the boy ke) 
*His parents expecting something every month end(since they take care of the boy)
*Rent
*Car payments
*Stress espan
"the only thing that really matters to me are ME, MY SON and MY MUSIC" (he hopes to be some house dj someday) and those were DJ STINGY's exact words ke bazalwane

realist
14 Sep 2010 14:11

Makisto, the day you decide to sign on the dotted line is the day you will stop giving your girlfriend now your wife money to do the hair. 

Personally I don’t see the justification for wasting 400 bugs on somebody’s hair still look the same. I rather buy unit trust for 3 years with that kind of money. 

Try my suggestion and you will never look back. My wife did the same and never looked back. 

I don’t mind spending 20 000 grand on a holiday but don’t tell me I must fork out 400 bugs monthly for a hair do, no way.

mathata
14 Sep 2010 14:11

you want to F* but you dont want to pay?????what im trying to say ...how can you have a perfect orgasm while thinking about bills....

 Thats  the problem when you give chewing gum boys your cake(not you),men dont mind to pay a Pros ...but as girlfriend you wont get it so easy.

poshspice
14 Sep 2010 14:14

@ the Lady I suppose you can also subscribe to his favourite newspapers, so they are delivered on your door steps rather than waking up early in the morning to buy them...

@Mawiniza...Redi Direko discussed that topic recently, people called in and said it is normal to them, I was shocked and did not know people do that.

mathata
14 Sep 2010 14:17

aikrapa di balls...................im dead....LMAO

othole di balls tsa  teng  disetlhefetse!okare    mangwele a bethile ke mariga.

Toxic
14 Sep 2010 14:19

Question for people in marriages or living together?

Do you have 'curfews' for each other? can s/he come home any time s/he feels like?

realist
14 Sep 2010 14:19

men dont mind to pay a Pros ...
It is a business transaction therefore you negotiate the prize. With a girlfriend it is another story.

realist
14 Sep 2010 14:23

Do you have 'curfews' for each other? can s/he come home any time s/he feels like?
Yes and absolutely not. 

If one of my friends is looking for me at my place and I’m not available, they are not allowed to wait for me at my place and vice versa and that is non negotiable.

pele
14 Sep 2010 14:25

i can pay for my girlfriend anything she wants, as long as she does'nt have the attitude of' 'you wnt to *bleep!* but dnt wnt to pay'' gee i will run, girl i promise you, girls with that attitude i can see them from afar, i once told a strory of how i treat girls like that.  money is not the issue but  that  attitude, damn i promise you i will never even spend a dime on you, i will rather donate to a shelter with AIDS orphans.
 TJO even if you calling me chewing gum boy, i wouldnt mind as i'll rather be called names than to settle for a whore(not you) who thinks man were made to make her life easy, by offering sex man must jump. sexs if enjoyed by both of us not me only, that is a fact.


TheLady
14 Sep 2010 14:26

Nxa hayi maan sies, somethings should be done in private. For me it's even difficult doing number2 in the same house nabantu if it's dead quiet. I turn the volume up and go fart in peace lol.

Subscribing doesn't make it as special as having woken especially for him. Ahh well mine isn't into newspapers anyway.

myname
14 Sep 2010 14:26

Right now I’m dating my pillow but if I’m dating I make sure i cook if i have time even though i suck in the kitchen but my boo can’t sleep on an empty stomach esp on Sunday. My mom taught me that. 

I give him sex ANYTIME he wants and i never have a headache but i also like it as well especially my morning glory. I can even ignore my mommy’s call esifa yi heart-attack. 

I respect him and care for him ALWAYS. 

When I love someone, I love him with all of my heart but I always meet bad boys but I’ll never give-up finding my one. 

I’m so scared to ask for money.  I would rather ask my friend while I have a man. I just hate this part coz most of my X had it but I couldn’t. Just give me if you want to.

I make sure I support him & be there for him when he needs me. I call & send u  "I LOVE U" out of the blue.
 
I’m always lucky, all my X had washing machines or an aunty to do the laundry and thank God i hate some else laundry. It’s worse if it’s jeans. So i never done any man's laundry.

I can talk 24/7 and change the statement sometimes.....We call it INCOKO in Xhosa. 

I love cleaning, it’s like my hobby. You don't have to tell me that the house is dirty, i clean it but i have my days since ndingahanbi nge EVER READY.

I love playing whatever sport you want. It can be soccer, volleyball, cricket, golf, basketball, jogging you name it. I also like learning a new sport if I don’t know. 

I like travelling around and do something new. I’m adventurous. 

I love get together with my man’s friends including their gfs’ if they have... no wonder some are still calling me even today. I'm flexible shame.

I don’t nag I hate being a puppy. I let you go with your boys. 

Guys I have so much love, believe me. I love surprises. I don’t care even if you buy me PS that says “I’m thinking of you or whatever message” but I appreciate any present you brought for me. I’m so kind like that. 

All in all I think I am the sweetest girlfriend but DONT take advantage of me coz all that can be history in few seconds.

Holiday
14 Sep 2010 14:26

Rona se re tlwaetse re jewa free like a donation...go leng ke matha looking for right Adam im even tired, i rather stick with my lousy bf and get miserable.

pele
14 Sep 2010 14:28

TJO even if you  were calling me chewing gum

mathata
14 Sep 2010 14:33

if you want to F*** just spend.

@realist.....d  hole that PROS have ..is not the same yr girl have???

@Pele you have a Point......but if is  attitude that men have......they must expect  a stick with two legs in bed

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 14:40

myname it's like you are gonna end that novel with
"Is there anybody interested out there?"

Akunani ngizokuthandazisa, loze line nangakini lol

mathata
14 Sep 2010 14:41

i said not you......why are you taking things personal..........

I said im professional  prostitute....bcs of marriage........i thought we are sharing ideas.

realist
14 Sep 2010 14:42

@realist.....d hole that PROS have ..is not the same yr girl have??? 
Granted, that is why it is expensive to be in a relationship.

Segololo
14 Sep 2010 14:43

@realist - can you please blog about that trust fund thing? or send me details on my pm on how to get about doing it... #offtopic

pele
14 Sep 2010 14:43

mathatha i know the are girls like that out there, hopefully you not one of them even if you are be gentle, dont be agressive with that money debate. 
Sometimes we just want to see how long can you last when money is no longer there. Woman love to be pampared and given money now and then we man(like me) know that and its not an issue as long as it not an exchange for sex. 
If i have money i am happy to share it with somone who makes me laugh even if am alone, but i hate demands they just make me retaliate. Fortunately we have so many independent ladies our there so No we wont wont sleep alone tu girl.

poshspice
14 Sep 2010 14:44

Do you have 'curfews' for each other? can s/he come home any time s/he feels like? 

heh heh I think curfews apply to women mostly. Men usually are the ones to set them and it becomes do as I say not as I do...he can come back home in the early hours of the morning, but you cannot dare do that. 

out of respect for each other you agree on an acceptable time to be home but if he/she does not stick to that time it shouldn't be an issue unless it becomes a habit to rock up at 4am in the morning...but I wouldn't like someone to treat me like a child, as long as I notify you that something has come up, I'll be home late, it should be enough

myname
14 Sep 2010 14:46

LOL TL but vele ke bafunani coz i do all that.
 Pls pray but you are silly! lol

pele
14 Sep 2010 14:47

No mathatha dont get me wrong i  am not taking this personal tu, i was just raising a word i call girls of this nature, just like you call boys who dont want to spend 'chewing gum' no hard feeling at all sorry if it sounds that way.

mathata
14 Sep 2010 14:50

@Pele.Aowa! im one of them......the fact is that i dont demand.,i count for d guy...how long his going to behave like that.i have its......but i make sure i receive  most of the time.

Aowa motho kgale a kanamisiwa,mahala!like a kitchen girl bitch.

pele
14 Sep 2010 14:57

mathatha as long as you dont take off your panties looking at my wallet the whole time. as i ahve said if you one of them do it teh ladyliek way, not the prosti.. kind of way.
be gentle girl, man(i know not all of us) can give you anything you want as long as they love your company, it's not about you giving me sex,

TheLady
14 Sep 2010 15:05

I didn't see Pooks there *wave* lol at DJ Stingy with his 2nd hand djing equipment mnxim

Pooky
14 Sep 2010 15:07

Tazteeq..yes i did hey with no hesitation...the dude didnt even wana do a simple thing as ama movies.Tjo nc nc nc, hai abanye abantu kodwa.

mathata
14 Sep 2010 15:07

mara you like it......?pls dont smile.

FanMail
14 Sep 2010 15:08

only joined this discussion... got an invite from Segs......

LMBAO!!!! All y'all are crazy!! cant even finish reading!!

Mathata fela! Kitchen Girl Bitch!!!! kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa kwa!!!

Pooky
14 Sep 2010 15:09

LOL Lady * waving back*

realist
14 Sep 2010 15:16

@realist - can you please blog about that trust fund thing? or send me details on my pm on how to get about doing it... #offtopic
@ Segololo
I’m not good at blogging but I will try and put it simply.
Unit trust: You can either apply for passively managed unit trust like Satrix or go actively managed unit trust. With Satrix you can invest a minimum lump sum of R1000 or R300 monthly debit order. 

To get an idea of how unit trusts perform go to equinox web site or fundsdata.co.za. You need to have an idea of which asset class you want invest in. Before you commit you need to understand on how unit trust function and which asset class you want to invest in. 

In this case I suggest you find out from your financial advisor and decide from there. Don’t take whatever your financial advisor recommends, rather do it yourself and you will be saving on the commission your financial advisor will be getting. 

The other option is the fundisa fund: This type of investment is aimed at parents who want to save for their kid’s education and do not want to take the risks associated with the markets. If you opt for this one, remember it is only geared for education and if you decide to take your money and do something with it beside education then you lose the bonus interest that you would have accrued. 

Remember with unit trust you are guaranteed to beat inflation compared to putting your money in the bank. 

Endowment savings: These used to be the thing back then but the costs associated with them are astronomical, rather do it yourself and take the risks it is worth it.

blueroze
14 Sep 2010 15:21

People let me tell you a trick a girlfriend of mine gave to me.........

when you have visitors and you need to go to the bathroom but are worried about the unpleasant noises that will come out, just open the basin tap and let the water run (i know some will tell me about saving water) get busy and walk out with confidence because they did not hear the thunder rolling.

Segololo
14 Sep 2010 15:22

Ta, realist... will defs check it out and see... much appreciated!


Sorry Tox...

myname
14 Sep 2010 15:28

I know about that Blue but what about the smell. Phela some people (not me lol) it can stay longer. I'd rather ndimince until i get home so i can be free

myname
14 Sep 2010 15:34

To add to realist' info u can call Satrix Securities at 086 110 0670

The Fundisa one u pay R200 per month & you get R600 bonus after 1 year.. Their no is 0860 386 3472 or go to www.asisa.org.za/fundisa

Remember it is better to start saving for our children while they are still young.

I wonder what happen if your child drop out. What do you do realist do you know?

Sorry Tox

blueroze
14 Sep 2010 15:37

Eish Realist you explained everything so nice. 
Thanks. I know about fundisa. 

I had viisted Satrix before but never fundsdata.

I just did not and BOY!!! I have never seen so many Economics(graphs and all) in one page my life.
Tjeer! it pains me that I can interprete it. That is the reason I am scared of this type of investments..bo ma JSE, Ivestec(dont even know if they do the same thing) and the likes

realist
14 Sep 2010 15:40

I wonder what happen if your child drop out. What do you do realist do you know?
I'm not, will find out.

Tox, let me apologize for going off topic on your.

belz
14 Sep 2010 15:40

shem myname. nami ngizfanela nawe, when i love, i love shem, angdlali ngentliziyo yomntu, but wangsukela, ziyasuka mchana, sohlangana emakethe. uphethe iwewe yakho eneweave, mna ngiphethe ispykos sam sekasi.

realist
14 Sep 2010 15:45

I wonder what happen if your child drop out. What do you do realist do you know?
I’m not sure, will find out.
Again, apology Tox

myname
14 Sep 2010 15:48

OK realist

but wangsukela, ziyasuka mchana, sohlangana emakethe. uphethe iwewe yakho eneweave, mna ngiphethe ispykos sam sekasi.

LOL to iwewe plus spykos hahahaha but i feel u Belzito. And i also have ur style so im not  expensive coz my chiskop cost me R30 per month. I shave once every two weeks.

mathata
14 Sep 2010 15:49

Ivestec you invest from R50 000 or more n you get 11  or 10%  a year...it depend.....dont put all your eggs into one basket.

mathata
14 Sep 2010 15:50

Investec  bathong.

maud
14 Sep 2010 16:14

nice topic sorry i missed it, @realist love to the fullest dont think about anything else you will enjoy life,about  dissapointment you will cross the bridge when you get there, money with love dont match, i dont remember asking anyone for  money to do my hair. but yes i feel up his petrol tank even if i dont use his car.love is sharing and caring  but yes ungangisukeli

FanMail
14 Sep 2010 16:21

money and family don't mix.... certainly money and relationships don't mix too! If she asks for money for whatever, its because she don't have some at that moment. give it to her, she'll love you more for yo kindness! Oh, plus you get laid more often!! Disclaimer: I'M NOT SAYING SHE IS A PROS!!!

and don't be reminding her about it sometime in the future!!

GML
15 Sep 2010 09:45

@One and Only: I don't like a woman who talks/wants a kiss early in the morning with a stinking mouth.

Does this mean you never get morning glory?

realist
15 Sep 2010 10:48

@Myname

I’ve spoken to someone at fundisa and this is what they said.
You will lose the government contribution but the interest accrued will stand.


zozoe
15 Sep 2010 10:49

i love this topic from begginning to end and in the end i love it too much coz we talked money

BM
15 Sep 2010 14:26

love this topic too, wow you guys can debate he, and thanks for the money classes that's way coooool.

myname
15 Sep 2010 14:31

Thank u realist.

Toxic
15 Sep 2010 14:38

siyabonga realist....


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